 By: Dr. Erica WollermanAt Thrive, we love working with teens and young adults! There are so many reasons for this passion and I thought it might be helpful to share more about WHY teens and young adults benefit so much from therapy, rather than just sharing about why we love working with them so much! This post is especially geared towards parents whose young adult kids are not interested in sharing much more than one syllable comments with them. (PS, you are not alone, this is not at all uncommon as I will discuss below!) The teen and young adult years are filled with so many exciting changes, including a huge growth in independence and interest in relationships outside of the immediate family. While for parents, this can be a difficult, tumultuous, and almost scary time, for teens, this is a time of amazing growth and development. Interestingly, while some teens and young adults stay connected emotionally with their parents and continue sharing information with them about the things they are experiencing, many others pull away from their parents. This is a normal part of the process of growing up and individuating away from our family of origin, but it can be difficult for parents who are used to being in the loop on what is going on for their kid. I believe that if you are a parent of a teen or young adult who is growing in independence and no longer sharing information with you, it is dramatically helpful to have another adult in their life. Ideally, a therapist who can connect with them, build a relationship of trust, and who can help guide their personal development or at least help them think through their choices. As a therapist who works with teens and young adults all the time, I can’t tell you how often I hear the thought process behind their decisions and can then share my more adult based perspective, which helps them make more thought through decisions. While I can’t guarantee any certain outcome or that they will notengage in things you don’t want them to, I can say with a good amount of certainty that they are thinking more about what they are doing. This helps reduce the amount of recovery time from mistakes, and often the overall number of dramatic mistakes. While many of the teens and young adults I work with have great judgment, many of them still struggle with impulse control and managing their reactions while feeling upset, emotional, or insecure. Working with a therapist that they trust, can help them cope differently and see situations from another person’s perspective. Often, my clients will tell me that while they don’t particularly love their parents’ decisions, they do understand them and know that they are helping them in the long run. It’s always interesting when my clients are able to reflect that they would probably do the same thing if they were the parent in any given situation. I’ve even had teens tell me they would probably be more strict or set other boundaries with their kids in the future! Just like in toddlerhood, teenage and young adult years come with a certain level of parent resistance. It’s almost like they are “programmed” to disagree with you! Working with a therapist, is a great way to divert some of this. Since we are not their parents, our relationship with them does not carry the same emotionality or reactivity so they are often more receptive to our suggestions or thoughts. My clients often tell me that I don’t feel like another adult but a friend, big sister, or mentor. These relationships produce less resistance, which is super helpful in terms of my ability to make suggestions and provide support and guidance. Another reason why I believe therapy should at least be offered to most teens and young adults is this... Being a teen or young adult can be really lonely. Especially if you are struggling with emotions, friends, relationships with your family, and feeling that you need to do things on your own. It can be a time when you feel that you have to do everything and don't really want advice from anyone else but where you also feel deep down that you have no idea what you are doing. I remember what this was like and though I would have resisted, would have loved to have an adult on my side! While I know that my initial statement of "every teen or young adult" needs therapy, may seem dramatic, I really do believe that this is an age group that particularly benefits from therapy for the reasons I described above and honestly, many more! Given the fact that we practice therapy at our office from a place of growth, self-understanding, and compassion, we strive to help our clients feel at home and never to feel that we are saying something is "wrong" with them. This approach helps teens feel at home with us and that it is okay to seek support when you need it! At Thrive, we take a positive, client centered approach to therapy that is focused on creating a genuine connection with our clients. If you would like to talk with a Thrive Therapist about yourself, your child, or teen attending therapy, please reach out to us by phone at 858-342-1304. As always, thanks for reading and comments are always welcome regarding any issues around child or teen psychotherapy services in San Diego by Thrive Therapy Studio. To stay in the loop on the services offered and to receive updated information about Thrive, please feel free to sign up for the newsletter through the following link: http://eepurl.com/cvGx5n.
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 By: Dr. Erica WollermanAt Thrive, we love supporting new and returning college students and young adults! For many, the process of moving towards independence from our parents can be really challenging but also exciting! The number of transitions faced by young adults can be so numerous – many are moving away from their parents for the first time, managing responsibilities that can feel overwhelming, balancing work and school perhaps for the first time, renting an apartment, trying to plan or start a career, entering into or leaving serious relationships, or starting a family. I remember while working at a college counseling center, just how often we talked with students about how all transitions, even positive ones, can be stressful and anxiety provoking. It really makes sense that during a time of so much transition, between the ages of 17-25 or so, having a supportive person to talk things through with can be so helpful. Here’s a list of 5 reasons why young adults LOVE coming to therapy. 1. Support! While most of us crave more independence as we near our adult years, it can also feel very lonely to be handling more things on your own as you age. Whether you live with your family or on your own, it can be difficult to feel supported especially if you are making more independent decisions. A therapist can help you feel that you have someone in your corner no matter what choices you make. 2. No judgment here Many people explore a lot of different ways of being in the world in their young adult years. This might include differing levels of partying, sexual encounters, risky choices in general, and varying interest in careers, work, and education. It is often difficult to talk with other friends about these experiences and most certainly can be difficult to talk with family about them! A therapist can provide a safe place to explore your choices while not feeling judged or controlled. 3. We are not your parent Many of us talk less to our parents while we start or continue the process of “launching” from their home. While this level of contact varies from person to person, it can be so helpful and reassuring to have another adult in your life who cares about you and can provide some level of advice and direction. While a therapist serves a much different role than a parent, we can help buffer the loneliness and challenge of navigating the world more independently. 4. Who am I? Where is my life headed? Therapists usually LOVE talking about identity and different paths people are going to take in their lives. This is a reason why young adults are so much fun for us to work with! Interestingly, we are not the only ones who love talking about these challenges! Our young adult clients usually want to explore them too and sometimes, it is better to do so in a space without parental involvement. Parents often have more emotional connection with their children’s development and goals which makes it difficult to give neutral feedback and space to make mistakes. We are here for you to sort things out and to walk with you no matter the choices or mistakes you may make! 5. Why me? I believe making meaning out of challenging life situations can be a reason many people love therapy but particularly our young adult clients appreciate having a space to process the challenges and difficult situations they face or have faced. We can help you make meaning and resolve challenges from your past so that you hopefully do not carry them as much into your future! While these are only a few reasons why young adults love working with our office, there are many more and perhaps you will have your own! We are passionate about helping young adults reach their full potential at our office and would love to work with you! At Thrive, we take a positive, client centered approach to therapy that is focused on creating a genuine connection with our clients. If you would like to talk with a Thrive Therapist attending therapy, please reach out to us by phone at 858-342-1304. As always, thanks for reading and comments are always welcome regarding any issues around child, teen, or young adult psychotherapy services in San Diego by Thrive Therapy Studio. To stay in the loop on the services offered and to receive updated information about Thrive, please feel free to sign up for the newsletter through the following link: http://eepurl.com/cvGx5n. By: Dr. Erica Wollerman Since Thrive was founded in 2016, it has been a personal and professional mission of mine to make sure that our office is a place where parents are supported. Now that I have become a mother myself, this has become even more of passion project for me. I thought it might be helpful to go beyond sharing about our goal to support parents to share more about exactly how we do that at Thrive. We support parents in many different ways, but the top 3 ways are as follows: 1. Individual Therapy Something that I believe makes Thrive a bit different from other offices who work with children and teens is that all of our therapists are not only comfortable but enjoyworking with the parents of our young clients. While, we only involve parents when the child/teen agrees and when it is in their best interest to do so, we always hope that we will be able to involve parents so that we can better support families as a whole. It is our belief that by helping families communicate and understand each other better, we can best facilitate change for everyone involved. We also work with adults in individual therapy and often support parents in their personal parenting journey as well as other challenges they might be experiencing. 2. Family Therapy Another way we like to support parents at Thrive is through family therapy. We love it when families call and request to work on their family relationships through family therapy and also can incorporate family work into individual treatment. Since we all work from a whole system based perspective, we can accommodate most families’ needs in terms of family work as well as individual therapy or group therapy. 3. Parent Consultation One of the services that I am the most proudto offer at Thrive is parent consultation. Parent consultation sessions are sessions where parents (with or without their co-parents) come in specifically to work on their parenting. Parent sessions are a great place to get specific advice and support tailored towards your families’ or child’s specific needs. I’ve found these sessions are extremely helpful for parents who either struggle in understanding their child/children or who are parenting children with special needs due to either a medical or psychological challenge. Plus, one on one parenting sessions are a great way to feel supported and create the much needed village in your parenting journey. I hope that this blog helps our readers understand more about what we offer at Thrive and how we meet our goal and passion project of supporting parents! Please feel free to contact us with any questions about how we might help you or your family! At Thrive, we take a positive, client centered approach to therapy that is focused on creating a genuine connection with our clients. If you would like to talk with a Thrive Therapist about yourself, your child, or teen attending therapy, please reach out to us by phone at 858-342-1304. As always, thanks for reading and comments are always welcome regarding any issues around child or teen psychotherapy services in San Diego by Thrive Therapy Studio. To stay in the loop on the services offered and to receive updated information about Thrive, please feel free to sign up for the newsletter through the following link: http://eepurl.com/cvGx5n.  By: Dr. Erica WollermanSince I am at times quoted in different articles, I thought it would be fun to post all of those articles in one place! Check out the following articles, videos, and posts about Thrive Therapy Studio since we started 2 years ago!
At Thrive, we take a positive, client centered approach to therapy that is focused on creating a genuine connection with our clients. If you would like to talk with a Thrive Therapist about yourself, your child, or teen attending therapy, please reach out to us by phone at 858-342-1304. As always, thanks for reading and comments are always welcome regarding any issues around child or teen psychotherapy services in San Diego by Thrive Therapy Studio. To stay in the loop on the services offered and to receive updated information about Thrive, please feel free to sign up for the newsletter through the following link: http://eepurl.com/cvGx5n. By: Lauren Spinelli, LCSW We all know about the importance of self-care - setting aside that “me time” to focus on improving our mental, emotional and physical health. However, between children, work, relationships, or just life in general, it can be hard to make it a priority and fit it into our busy lives. On average, people in the United States work almost 2,000 hours per year! That’s a lot! Since we are at our place of work so much, it’s important to make sure we’re taking care of ourselves while we’re there! Here are 5 easy, simple tips to weave self-care into your daily work routine! 1. Meditate Now, I’m not talking about setting aside thirty minutes or an hour in quiet room at work. That’s probably not possible...but I bet you have 16 seconds! That’s all it takes! 16 beautiful, simple seconds to clarity. Not only does it have a significant de-stressing impact in the moment, but it can also serve as the foundation for greater clarity of thought, heightened creativity, deeper intuition and aid in making better choices! Setting aside 16 seconds each day to meditate can actually change your brain waves and have a positive influence on your emotional health. Let’s try it right now! Observe your breath as you slowly inhale through your nostrils to the count of four. Then hold that breath in your belly to the count of four. Gently release the breath and follow it out to the count of four. Then hold the breath out to the count of four. Now return to regular breathing. 2. Schedule breaks Taking regular mental breaks throughout the day improves productivity and creativity. Long periods of concentration fatigue your brain, and giving it downtime restores your ability to problem solve and concentrate. Try to actually schedule multiple 5-10 minute breaks throughout your day. If you don’t put it in your calendar, it’s easy to skip it! Skipping these breaks and trying to plow through your work can leave you exhausted and stressed. 3. Drink water Did you know 75% of our brain is made up of water? Even the tiniest levels of dehydration can affect factors like your mood and cognitive functioning. Next time you feel that after-lunch sluggishness creeping up on you, there’s a good chance it’s due to dehydration! Actual amounts of water that you need vary person to person, but aim to drink 0.5 ounces of water per pound on a daily basis! Bring that water bottle to work and leave it on your desk so there’s no excuse! 4. Walk outside We spend about 2,000 hours a year at work, and most of that is inside at an office! Try to get outside during lunch, or even hold walking meetings. Have a phone call? Take it outside! A 2015 study done at Stanford University proved that being outside in nature “showed decreased activity in a region of the brain associated with a key factor in depression”. The study also found that that those who walked outside experienced less anxiety, rumination, and negative affect, as well as more positive emotions, such as happiness. 5. Ask for help We are all human. We all need help. Asking for help is not a sign of weakness, but a sign of strength and intelligence. Ensure you have a solid support system at work. You spend so much time there, it’s important to surround yourself with trusted colleagues! At Thrive, we take a positive, client centered approach to therapy that is focused on creating a genuine connection with our clients. If you would like to talk with a Thrive Therapist about yourself, your child, or teen attending therapy, please reach out to us by phone at 858-342-1304. As always, thanks for reading and comments are always welcome regarding any issues around child, teen, or adult psychotherapy services in San Diego by Thrive Therapy Studio. To stay in the loop on the services offered and to receive updated information about Thrive, please feel free to sign up for the newsletter through the following link: http://eepurl.com/cvGx5n.  By: Dr. Erica Wollerman I can’t tell you how often the topic of being “broken” or “damaged beyond repair” comes up in my therapy sessions. I believe that asking for help in the form of therapy is one of the most courageous steps someone can take. It is incredibly brave to reach out and say that you may need more support as well as to take the time to tell your story to a complete stranger. This is why it’s a big deal to me when someone reaches out to us to start the process of therapy for either themselves or their child or teen!
Interestingly, people who are asking for help definitely typically do not feel brave or courageous. Unfortunately, our culture leads people to feel that they are weak or flawed for needing help. This frustrates me for many reasons but a big one is that it makes it so incredibly hard for people to get to a place where they are okay receiving therapy and help. So often, people tell me that they are “broken, damaged, and a problem,” when they come into therapy. It is so sad for me to hear that they feel this way but provides a valuable opportunity for us to discuss what this means and why they feel that way. A favorite topic of mine when this sentiment comes up with my clients is to share about Kintsukuroi, which is the “Japanese art of mending broken pottery using lacquer resin laced with gold or silver” (reference from Wikipedia). Essentially, this practice means that when something breaks, it is not thrown away or considered broken, trash, damaged, etc., but it is then transformed into something new and even more beautiful. I find this to be such a beautiful philosophy and completely parallel to what I notice as a therapist about people who have struggled, and at times struggled in incredibly difficult ways. People are not weak, broken, or damaged when they have experienced struggle and allow themselves to come out on the other side of that struggle. If they allow themselves to process through the struggle and to allow growth to happen despite the awful things that may have happened in their lives, they often grow and develop into someone more empathic, understanding, strong, and beautiful. This brings up the concept of post-traumatic growth, which is the personal growth that can sometimes come from trauma. While no one would ever wish for trauma or say that they are glad a traumatic event happened (I certainly wouldn’t), many of my clients do acknowledge that because of the trauma or challenge they have experienced in their lives, they are different and often “better” people in some way that they appreciate. It is like the cracks were filled in with gold or silver just like a piece of Japanese pottery. At Thrive, we take a positive, client centered approach to therapy that is focused on creating a genuine connection with our clients. If you would like to talk with a Thrive Therapist about yourself, your child, or teen attending therapy, please reach out to us by phone at 858-342-1304. As always, thanks for reading and comments are always welcome regarding any issues around child or teen psychotherapy services in San Diego by Thrive Therapy Studio. To stay in the loop on the services offered and to receive updated information about Thrive, please feel free to sign up for the newsletter through the following link: http://eepurl.com/cvGx5n.  By: Erica Wollerman, PsyDParents who call Thrive are often feeling desperately in need of support for their family, their child or teen, and often themselves. While the issues they are calling us about vary, they talk to us about how they just do not know how to help their child or teen through the situation they are experiencing, how their child or teen has changed dramatically, and how they are losing touch with them and sometimes are barely even talking anymore. I can’t emphasize enough how much compassion we at Thrive feel for the parents we work with. We know they are scared, frustrated, and often feeling ineffective as a parent and that is why we always try to focus on supporting the whole family, rather than just the person in therapy with us.
Part of this is inevitably trying to determine how we can best help parents support their child or teen’s therapy or overall development. This blog is dedicated to ways parents can help make therapy more successful, even if they are not coming in to session. Here are my favorite tips!
I hope these are helpful suggestions for you! It is easy as parents to devalue your role in your child or teen’s treatment but your role is crucial to the success of their therapy! If you would like to talk with a Thrive Teen Therapist about your child or teen attending therapy with one of us, please reach out to us either via email at ewollerman.psyd@gmail.com or phone at 858-342-1304. If you would like to receive updated information about Thrive Therapy, please feel free to sign up for our newsletter through the following link: http://eepurl.com/cvGx5n. As always, thanks for reading and comments are always welcome regarding any issues around child, teen counseling and adult psychotherapy services in San Diego by Thrive Therapy Studio. 
One of the most common challenges parents talk with me about is not necessarily recognizing that their child or teen might benefit from therapy, but how to talk with the child or teen about attending therapy. In our current culture it is so common for kids to feel that they are being told there is something wrong with them or that they are crazy when they are told they are going to go to therapy. Luckily, there are definitely some things that parents can do to help ease this process and prepare their child. Here are my top 5 ideas!
I hope this helps give you ideas about ways you might talk with your child or teen about therapy. As a sneak peak of next week’s blog, another way parents can make therapy more successful is by not putting pressure on therapy. Letting their child or teen work through things with the therapist without a lot of pressure to “get better” or “fix the problem” helps your child adjust to therapy and can help therapy to be more successful! If you would like to talk with a Thrive Therapist about your child attending therapy with one of us, please reach out to us either via email at ewollerman.psyd@gmail.com or phone at 858-342-1304. If you would like to receive updated information about Thrive Therapy, please feel free to sign up for our newsletter through the following link: http://eepurl.com/cvGx5n. As always, thanks for reading and comments are always welcome regarding any issues around child, teen psychotherapy services in San Diego by Thrive Therapy Studio. Written By: Erica Wollerman, PsyD  Why Choose Thrive?In starting Thrive Therapy Studio, my mission was to expand my practice in order to be able to touch more lives both through helping more people and training more therapists in the style of therapy I believe to be most effective. The first step in this process was finding a name and believe me, this was one of the longer steps as I wanted to have a name for the practice that conveyed our mission.
THRIVE… I chose Thrive because it conveys what I am hoping for my clients and the professionals with whom I am fortunate enough to work! I want all of us to figure out a way to not just get through life, cope, or muddle through but to figure out how to Thrive, even in some of the hardest and most challenging circumstances. I believe that is possible for all of us through self-reflection and, well, for better or worse, a good amount of hard work. THERAPY… Well this one is probably obvious ;) But I wanted to make sure everyone knew up front what we do and what we are all about! We are all about therapy, be it individual, couples, group, or family. STUDIO… The easy answer here is that some other names were taken such as Center, Clinic, etc. But the more interesting answer is that the more I thought about my vision for the work we do, the more I wanted to convey that we are not top-down doctors who will medically determine what path you need to take. We are colleagues on your journey to insight and change and we welcome you into our offices just as though they are our homes. I felt that Studio conveys the homeyness we are cultivating in our offices. Now, to share a bit more about our mission and goals at Thrive since you know more about the name and intention around it J Our mission is simple and complex all at once as life so often is. We want to help as many people as we can live meaningful, brave, and authentic lives. We believe that we can do this best by being down to earth, warm, and truly authentically genuine with our clients. Therapy is tough and we believe that a sense of humor and ability to truly connect with people, makes it that much easier to do the hard work entailed in changing ourselves and our lives. This is why we balance being approachable while also challenging our clients to make changes they believe are right for them. That’s right, we are not the ones deciding goals and what needs to change for people… We expect our clients to collaborate with us in determining what changes they want to make. This is part of the foundation of Thrive is that we are not your typical bossy doctors who think we know better than you. We want to help you find your inner voice towards growth, wisdom, insight, and change and will be a guide on your journey. Sometimes we might walk next to you, other times in front, and also behind and let you lead the way. This means that we do not have magic answers because our belief is that there are no shortcuts or magic when it comes to true, deep, life-altering change. That kind of lasting change takes serious work and that is the work that we do together at Thrive Therapy Studio. Please see our Values section of our website if you’d like to read more about what guides our work at Thrive! We will also be sharing more about the Thrive Philosophy in the coming weeks. Please post any comments or questions you may have! As always, thank you for reading! Being a therapist brings me so much joy. I get to connect with individuals from all walks of life and see the world through their lens. There are many reasons why I love being a therapist. I will share 6 of these reasons below.
1. It is a challenge. Therapy is hard work, not just for the client but for the therapist too. Therapy is like an intricate dance, and it is important for the therapist to know when to move delicately, move boldly, and when to let the client do a solo while you cheer them on. Although the work can be challenging, it is incredibly rewarding. 2. It is an honor and privilege to be apart of someone’s journey. Being given access into a person’s thoughts and feelings as well as seeing a person at their most vulnerable, is truly a privilege. In a fast past society where time seems to fly by, being able to be present and in the moment with another human being is a wonderful gift. It is an honor to be able to just BE with a client, with no agenda, in whatever it is they are going through. 3. I enjoy my role as a guide and a cheerleader. It is a pleasure working alongside my clients, supporting, guiding, and rooting them on as they brave the challenges life can sometimes bring. The reward of being able to witness my clients learn about themselves and grow is invaluable. 4. It is inspiring. I too learn and evolve. My clients are as much my teachers as I am theirs. My approach to therapy is a partnership, and in that partnership there is learning occurring on both sides. My clients never cease to amaze and inspire me with their strength, courage, and resilience. 5. Therapy is dynamic. There is never a dull moment. Each client is so different and brings their own life experiences and challenges and I get to come along on the journey, even if it is for a brief period of time. Being multiracial, I value diversity and multiculturalism, and enjoy the diverse array of clients I see. 6. I am there for the best and the worst. I get to witness the human experience. It’s not always pretty, but it is real. In a society where it is unclear what is real sometimes, I am grateful to be part of the REAL human experience and it is truly an honor. Thank you for reading! For more information about Dr. Fowlks and her services, please contact her at 858.401.6929 or check her profile out here. |
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Thrive Therapy Studio Therapists Offer Child, Teen, Adult, Marriage and Family Psychotherapy Counseling Services in San Diego, California.
