Child, Teen and Adult Psychotherapy Services in San Diego
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5 Ways to Cope with Pandemic Holidays

12/4/2020

 
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As I have noticed with my clients, friends, family, and well, myself - holidays this year are feeling pretty complicated. Decision making about what to do and who is safe to see is just incredibly challenging and has been challenging throughout the pandemic. It seems like that challenge only increases as the pandemic continues to worsen this month as so many of us are just plain worn out from worrying about risks and missing our loved ones terribly. For those of us who are sticking it out as much as possible at home, I thought it might be helpful to share some ideas of how we can get through this situation and hopefully enjoy the holidays. 

  1. Pick and Choose - The most important holiday tip that I share with clients is always to pick and choose what you do. I think it is crucial that we as parents decide what traditions are the most meaningful and important for our families rather than trying to do all of them. For families with older kids, I encourage parents to check in with their kids to see what they feel is enjoyable or to pick one tradition each to make sure you do. This way you can focus on those things and only do things that truly bring you joy. It’s like the Marie Kondo approach for the holidays! 
  2. Focus on the things that are possible - I think it could be really easy this year to get very focused about all of the things we are not doing or missing out on. I know it was tough for my family to see so many others visit and gather with their loved ones for Thanksgiving and it took a conscious effort to focus on what a great day our little family was having instead. So, make sure to try to process the loss we are dealing with and allow a space for your children to do so too. But after that, focus on what is possible and how we can make those things fun. 
  3. Create new traditions - Sometimes it can help to break out of the mold and do something new instead of a modified version of a beloved tradition. If you usually spent the night at grandma’s, maybe try to make it extra fun to stay home this year with jammies and a fort in the living room or something. The thing that is important is to try to determine if doing the modified version will make you feel more sad or happy to have some closeness to your usual tradition. If it will bring joy, try it out! If you think it will just feel like a poor replacement, maybe try something you haven’t done before. 
  4. Focus on the Pro’s - I am a firm believer that there are truly pros and cons to everything. So, while we might be missing out on traveling to see family (I know we are!), we could try to focus on what we would not miss about those trips. For me, it is packing up and traveling with what feels like our whole house to keep our toddler entertained. And definitely the flights with a toddler!  So this year, while I am sad to miss out on the family visits, I am not entirely sad to miss out on the work part of the trip itself! 
  5. Take some time to rest - This year has just been so incredibly intense that I think all of us could use a holiday season without some of the hustle and bustle. While I recognize that many of us truly love that part of things this time of year, we likely are not needing more pressure or things to do. So, I think we could take this time to really try to rest and enjoy whatever down time we can. I think it is really needed particularly because of the difficulty of 2020 but also to help us stay intentional in how we cope with our feelings about the differences in our holidays. It will be easier to recognize and acknowledge our emotions if they have time to be expressed and felt. If we rush through this time (because it truly does feel easier to be distracted), we might end up even more sad or grumpy in the long run. I would encourage you to allow yourself some space to access emotions, rest, and then cope in whatever way works best for you and your family. 

I know that this is not an easy time for any of us. Holidays are already a challenging time of year for so many people that adding in a pandemic that is spiraling out of control is just unreal. Perhaps the most important thing we can all do is to just go easy on ourselves during this time. Let’s try not to set up expectations that might not be met and just get through this time one day at a time, hopefully finding some joy and holiday cheer along the way. 

If you or your loved ones would like added support, Thrive is accepting new clients over telehealth! Contact us today!
At Thrive, we take a positive, client centered approach to therapy that is focused on creating a genuine connection with our clients.  If you would like to talk with a Thrive Therapist about yourself, your child, or teen attending therapy via video sessions, please reach out to us by phone at 858-342-1304. 
 
As always, thanks for reading and comments are always welcome regarding any issues around child or teen psychotherapy services in San Diego by Thrive Therapy Studio.  
 
To stay in the loop on the services offered and to receive updated information about Thrive, please feel free to sign up for the newsletter through the following link: 
http://eepurl.com/dsgLNL.

Surviving the Holidays Blog Collection

12/12/2019

 

Happy Holidays from all of us at Thrive to all of our Thrive blog readers! 

At Thrive, we know that the holidays can be a very stressful or emotionally difficult time for families. If you or your loved ones would like support, please call or email us today!  We still have therapists on our team who are working and happy to support you!  

​We at Thrive have certainly noticed that the holidays bring a certain level of expectation, anxiety, and feelings of overwhelm and overcommitment for many of the families, kids included, that we work with. This year does not seem any different and perhaps is even more stressful and overwhelming due to the timing of the holidays. Many of the families we have been working with are particularly stressed and worried about how they will accomplish all the things they either want to, or feel that they are expected, to accomplish. 
 
I wanted to share some of our previous blogs on this topic as I felt that they are still helpful and a fun blast from the past! 

Here are some of my favorites!

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Dr. Maria Fowlks – In this blog she writes about managing the overwhelm of the holiday season as a parent and understanding that your child might be overwhelmed too.  

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​Dr. Erica Wollerman – This blog shares ways parents can manage expectations during the holidays  

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​Dr. Erica Wollerman – This blog is all about coping with holiday anxiety

I hope you enjoyed these blog posts and found them helpful in the hustle and bustle of the season!  If there is anything we can do to support you and your loved ones now or in the New Year, please feel free to reach out via phone or email! 

At Thrive, we take a positive, client centered approach to therapy that is focused on creating a genuine connection with our clients.  If you would like to talk with a Thrive Therapist about yourself, your child, or teen attending therapy, please reach out to us by phone at 858-342-1304. 
 
As always, thanks for reading and comments are always welcome regarding any issues around child or teen psychotherapy services in San Diego by Thrive Therapy Studio.  
 
To stay in the loop on the services offered and to receive updated information about Thrive, please feel free to sign up for the newsletter through the following link: 
http://eepurl.com/dsgLNL.

How to enjoy the holidays with your teen

12/11/2019

 
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By: Dr. Erica Wollerman 

I thought it might be nice to take a short break from our parenting teens and the challenges of being a teen blog series to focus a bit more on the holidays in our families. The holidays are always such a busy time for families as well as a difficult one for many reasons. Some families are grieving family members who have passed or changes in their family that have affected who is present for the holidays. Others are just so overscheduled and busy with travel, gifts, events, hosting family, and All. The. Things. we are supposed to do that it is not the most enjoyable of seasons. I wanted to post a bit about how to try and enjoy the holidays, particularly if you have a teen at home. 
 
Let’s start off with a general holiday survival tip - My biggest tip for enjoying the holidays that really can apply to any family is to work on reducing your obligations and replacing them with things you actually enjoy. Often, as parents, we feel responsible for cultivating the perfect holiday with perfect traditions. For many people, this is overwhelming and creates a sense of irritation when your efforts are not recognized or even appreciated by your family members. I encourage families to focus on the things and events about the holidays that they truly enjoy and cut everything else out. It’s okay not to do everything and it’s even better to do the things you love so that it truly can be a time of connection and enjoyment as a family! 
 
My two tips for enjoying holidays with a teen are: 
 
1.  Meet them where they are at
This is huge. I’ve had years of conversations with parents who tell me all the things they hope and want to do with their teen during their break. Or, what they think their teen “should” be doing. I encourage parents all the time to really put themselves in their kids’ shoes. Teens are chronically tired, stressed, and overwhelmed these days. When you feel that way, would you really want your parents putting more demands on you?  Probably not. Check in with them about what they are hoping for over break and make sure to set up clear expectations about things you really need them to participate in or take care of. The more this is a dialogue, rather than a top down exercise in telling them what to do, the better it will go! 
 
2.  Expect less 
In general, I would say that the above tip is going to require this tip. You will most likely be hoping for more than your teen can or is willing to give. If you go into the holidays expecting gratitude, lots of family time playing board games, and definitely not a lot of “screen time” or time with friends, you are ultimately setting yourself up for disappointment and hurt feelings. Every teen I work with looks at breaks from school as opportunities to sleep, rest, watch TV, and spend time with their friends. Even the ones who have great relationships with their parents. I repeat, even the ones who love spending time with their parents. As a parent, it is important not to interpret your teen’s disinterest in whatever it is you are suggesting as a reflection of how much they care about you or want to be with you. It is a reflection of their current place and stage in life. 
 
I hope this is helpful!  I wish all of you a happy holiday season and remember, we are here to help at Thrive even during the holidays! Call or email us today if you would like more information about how we can help you and your family thrive!
 
At Thrive, we take a positive, client centered approach to therapy that is focused on creating a genuine connection with our clients.  If you would like to talk with a Thrive Therapist about yourself, your child, or teen attending therapy, please reach out to us by phone at 858-342-1304. 
 
As always, thanks for reading and comments are always welcome regarding any issues around child or teen psychotherapy services in San Diego by Thrive Therapy Studio.  
 
To stay in the loop on the services offered and to receive updated information about Thrive, please feel free to sign up for the newsletter through the following link: 
http://eepurl.com/dsgLNL.

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Thrive Therapy Studio
5230 Carroll Canyon Rd. Ste 110
​San Diego, CA 92121
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They become habits. 
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Thrive Therapy Studio Therapists Offer Child, Teen, Adult, Marriage and Family Psychotherapy Counseling Services in San Diego, California.
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  • Welcome
  • About Thrive
    • Meet the Thrive Team >
      • Dr. Erica Wollerman
      • Dr. Maria Fowlks
      • Jennifer Gonzalez, LMFT
      • Ying-Ying Shiue, LPCC
      • Kim Macias, APCC
      • Dr. Andrea Seldomridge
      • Molly Llamas, AMFT
      • Abbey Stewart, AMFT
    • Appointment Information
  • Contact
  • Services
    • Group Therapy at Thrive >
      • Anxiety Group For Teens
      • Parent Support Group
      • Middle School Social-Emotional Processing Group
      • Young Adults Group (18-24)
    • Therapy for Children
    • Therapy for Teens and Young Adults
    • Therapy for Adults
    • Family Therapy
    • Parent Consultation
  • Resources
    • Information About Therapy
    • Academic Resources
    • San Diego Resources
    • Covid-19 Resources
    • Anti-Racism Resources
    • Recommended Reading
    • Resources for Specific Challenges >
      • Addiction and Recovery Information
      • ADHD
      • Anger Management
      • Anxiety
      • Autism/Developmental Disorders
      • Child Abuse and Domestic Violence
      • Depression
      • Eating Disorders/Body Image Issues
      • Personal Growth/Managing Perfectionism
      • LGBTQIA
      • Parenting
      • Relationships
      • Stress Management/Mindfulness
      • Teen Issues
  • Blog