 By: Dr. Erica WollermanWe get a lot of calls from people who share their current challenges and concerns and jump pretty quickly to what they want and believe they need. Tools. Coping Skills. Strategies. I find this interesting as a therapist who generally engages in very deep, complex work with my clients. Even with my clients who initially thought that they just wanted some “tools,” we also do some pretty deep work in understanding how their challenges came to be before we move on to tools. I believe in doing therapy in a way that you will hopefully get some tools and strategies to manage your life or symptoms more effectively, but also gain a deeper understanding of yourself, relationships with others, and higher levels of self-compassion. Some may wonder why this is a goal… I am of the belief that most of the things in our lives that we want “tools” to fix, are not as simple as they seem. For example, someone may want help making changes in the way that they use alcohol. Simple, right? Just stop drinking so much? Actually, this “simple” challenge is so complex once you get into exploring it. You need to consider why you drink, what alcohol symbolically represents in your life or self, what it does in your relationships to yourself and others, what habits you have around drinking, why you continue drinking, how successful you think you will be in stopping, and what feelings you might be using alcohol to either mask or cope with. There is so much to explore, understand, and process as people. Unfortunately, our quick fix culture has us reaching for quick fixes even in therapy. We want quick tools or strategies to manage our problems or challenges, rather than going inward to consider what is really going on in our lives. This is true for children too. Parents want their children to cope with stress better, especially in the teen years. And boy, do we have some really stressed out teens in our culture! It breaks my heart but that’s a different topic. So, we get calls from parents who want their teen to learn tools to manage stress. First, we need to understand the stress and explore it. Often, I find the stressed out teens I work with have completely unrealistic expectations of themselves to be perfect, or always on top of things, or to get into impossible schools. So, we need to explore those expectations, how they develop, what might be more realistic for them, or how to think about their goals in a more effective way. This is SO much more than tools. This is self-understanding and growth that will go a long way when that teen or child has challenges later in their life. My belief is that just stopping at providing tools or strategies for my clients is a short-term fix. It will probably work for a while and then some of the same things will come back up either in the same way, or different ways. I believe this is because often our symptoms or bad habits are products of a deeper challenge in meeting our emotional needs. In that deep, complex understanding of ourselves, we can truly figure out what is going on and how to take steps towards living a different life. At Thrive, we take a positive, client centered approach to therapy that is focused on creating a genuine connection with our clients. If you would like to talk with a Thrive Therapist about yourself, your child, or teen attending therapy, please reach out to us by phone at 858-342-1304. As always, thanks for reading and comments are always welcome regarding any issues around child or teen psychotherapy services in San Diego by Thrive Therapy Studio. To stay in the loop on the services offered and to receive updated information about Thrive, please feel free to sign up for the newsletter through the following link: http://eepurl.com/cvGx5n.
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A note from Thrive's founder, Dr. Erica Wollerman: Welcome to our latest blog series! Since I am often the one writing our Thrive blogs, I wanted to make sure that our readers would be able to also get to know the amazing team I work with at Thrive. I am so grateful to work with each of these therapists and they each offer our clients something special. Since we have a team of 7, we truly have a therapist who will match most clients who reach out to us in terms of style and personality. Anoushey is an amazingly calming, compassionate, and warm therapist. We are grateful to have her on the Thrive team!  Tell us about you and why you wanted to become a therapist. My name is Anoushey and I’m so glad I get to share something about myself with you. Just like our clients, our lives as therapists are also shaped by our unique stories. I was born and raised in Pakistan, my upbringing, culture and education plays an important role in who I’m as a person and as a therapist. It also gives me an appreciation of the complexity of our emotional lives and the various factors that influence it. Becoming a therapist: My father read me stories when I was a child, some were fables while others were fairy tales but most were real life anecdotes of the human experience. The narrations were always rich and vivid with descriptions of not only what people did but also how they felt. These early experiences made me curious and appreciative of people’s personal journeys especially the intricate tapestry of emotions that were manifested and expressed through their behavior. As a teenager when I grew even more curious about mental health, I realized that in Pakistan mental health awareness and services were far and few. Nevertheless I came across an article one day that described the work of an organization providing services to children and teen survivors of Child Sexual Abuse in a safe and a confidential environment. This became a turning point in my life and led me to the path of pursuing therapy as my passion, profession and life’s calling. What do you love about being a therapist? I believe I always wanted to be a therapist even when I didn’t really know that a profession like it even exists! To be chosen as a witness, confidante and a companion in someone’s journey of self-discovery. What an incredible honor and a coveted responsibility and one which I accept with great pride as well as humility. How would you describe yourself as a therapist? I’m attentive, respectful, empathic and collaborative. I believe in my clients potential to be the best navigator of their own lives. I serve as an anchor, advocate and cheerleader and foster a non judgmental and warm relationship where my clients feel safe to explore and resolve their challenges. Do you have a particular theory or framework that guides your work as a therapist? I am a client centered therapist which means that I believe that our clients carry within themselves a vast resource for self discovery and fulfillment. My role as a therapist is to provide a warm and genuine environment that empowers the clients to tap into this reservoir. As their therapist, I view my clients with an unconditional positive regard which is a necessary component of our therapeutic relationship and one that nurtures the client’s self-growth. At the same time I challenge my clients to push their limits and take personal responsibility when I witness them getting stuck. I also rely on my education and training to use empirically proven therapeutic techniques to steer my clients as they encounter roadblocks. Who do you love working with in therapy? Any and everyone! Every detail and dimension of a client’s background presents a unique opportunity to understand not only the client but also the world that they inhibit. It also makes me a better therapist because I get the opportunity to be taught by clients from varied age range and backgrounds and form a more holistic worldview. In my professional experience I have worked with children for over 10 years and I absolutely love utilizing the tools of Play Therapy. I have helped children cope with trauma, navigate through adjustment and identity issues, loss, anxiety, depression as well as school related problems. Working with children and teens gives me immense joy as sometimes I might be the only grown up they feel safe enough to confide in or look up to as a role model. I whole heartedly embrace this privilege and model healthy boundaries, trusting relationship, emotional regulation, and fostering of healthy self-esteem. In addition I view working with parents and families as a crucial component of lasting change not only for the child but also for the whole family. Share one thing you are passionate about in your professional or personal life. Being curious about people and places is a personal and professional passion. I love traveling especially with my husband and my two boys. Through travel, I want to give my kids the gift of learning and celebrating different cultures. For more information about Anoushey and her work, please check out her bio here! If you would like to schedule an appointment with Jennifer, please also feel free to call our main number and ask for her or fill out our contact form here and note that you would prefer to work with Anoushey! By: Panicha McGuire, LMFT, RPT Welcome to the final blog of my play therapy blog series! The series goes over how play therapy works with children, teens, and adults. Don’t forget to check out my previous posts on play therapy with children and teens! Play therapy with adults! Does that really exist? Why, yes it does. Although most adults think they have outgrown using play as a way to explore and experience the world, adults already engage in play on a daily basis. Do you dress up for themed parties? Or play sports? Sing along to music? Maybe even a game of poker? Play is always a part of our lives and it is a way for us relieve stress. There is actually a significant amount of research behind the neuroscience of play. Not only is play a helpful way to help adults learn and improve their overall well-being, play can help therapists get through to the deeper issues. I find that my clients tend to open up more when they are relaxed and can have fun while putting aside their rational and objective “adult” selves. In my practice, I use play therapy with adults to treat issues such as grief and loss, trauma, emotional development issues, social communication, and mood disorders. Some examples of play therapy activities I use with my adult clients are:
Like any other treatment methods, the most important thing about using play therapy is to be sure that it fits the client. These techniques are just examples of how I’ve used play with some of my adult clients. At Thrive, we always match our interventions and techniques to our client’s unique needs and goals.
At Thrive, we take a positive, client centered approach to therapy that is focused on creating a genuine connection with our clients. If you would like to talk with a Thrive Therapist about yourself, your child, or teen attending therapy, please reach out to us by phone at 858-342-1304. As always, thanks for reading and comments are always welcome regarding any issues around child or teen psychotherapy services in San Diego by Thrive Therapy Studio. To stay in the loop on the services offered and to receive updated information about Thrive, please feel free to sign up for the newsletter through the following link: http://eepurl.com/cvGx5n. By: Panicha McGuire, LMFT, RPT Welcome to my blog series on play therapy! The series will go over how play therapy works with children, teens, and even adults. Don’t forget to check out my previous post on play therapy with young children and school-aged children! This week, we will focus on how play therapy works with tweens and teens. Recently, many parents who refer their teens to see me will see my Registered Play Therapist credential and wonder how this will work with their teen because their teen doesn’t “play” anymore. Well, our teens are not yet adults but are not children either. So, what does that mean when it comes to play therapy? Many of our tweens and teens are already going through so much with hormone changes, peer pressure, school pressure, and identity struggles, it can be difficult to expect them to just talk. Having a teen sit in a room with a professional and asking them to share or answer intrusive questions can be really intimidating. I find that my teens are more relaxed when they are engaged in an activity. Play therapy with teens is simply using activities or experiences that would be of interest to the teen while resolving their issues. It can be a way to engage them in something that might seem “boring” or “uncool”. I’ve actually completed a complicated Lego model with a teen once. We would work on it little by little in our sessions while the teen shared their struggles with me. The finished Lego project then became a symbol of healing. Some examples of play therapy with teens that I use in my practice are:
At Thrive, we take a positive, client centered approach to therapy that is focused on creating a genuine connection with our clients. If you would like to talk with a Thrive Therapist about yourself, your child, or teen attending therapy, please reach out to us by phone at 858-342-1304. As always, thanks for reading and comments are always welcome regarding any issues around child or teen psychotherapy services in San Diego by Thrive Therapy Studio. To stay in the loop on the services offered and to receive updated information about Thrive, please feel free to sign up for the newsletter through the following link: http://eepurl.com/cvGx5n. By: Panicha McGuire, LMFT, RPT Welcome to my blog series on play therapy! The series will go over how play therapy works with children, teens, and even adults! I often get many questions and concerns from parents regarding the use of play therapy and how it works. My hope is that this blog series can shed some light on some myths or concerns. There’s a common misconception that play therapy is simply playing, and as many parents would think, “Why would I pay for someone to play with my child?”. Play therapy is actually more than just play. It’s actually a recommended treatment for children of all ages. Children communicate through play. They play before they even acquire verbal language. Imagine a child who has witnessed violence and abuse in the home, their play would most likely reveal themes of aggression and violence with their toys. Therapists use play therapy to help children express their feelings when they might not have verbal language to do so, or when saying it out loud is difficult. The goal of play therapy is to help children express themselves through a comfortable medium, and learn effective ways to solve problems. What can I expect in play therapy for a young child or school-aged children? At our practice, parents and caregivers play an important role in the child’s treatment. I usually start with an intake interview with parent(s) to collect information about the child, and to discuss what they hope to see change. When it applies, I also like to include the child’s teacher, providers, or other caregivers to get a good overall look at the child’s environment. In the playroom, there are specific types of toys and games that encourage the child to express themselves such as dollhouses, instruments, or arts and crafts. Depending on the child, I would either let them express themselves without any direction from me (nondirective) or I would guide them with specific activities (directive). Play therapy sessions typically start at once a week and usually last 45 minutes. In my experience, nondirective therapy works best for my clients that have difficulty opening up or have had traumatic experiences as these clients need time and space to resolve their issues. Most clients that I see, however, fall under the directive category. This type of play therapy has more input from the therapist and includes teaching skills or asking direct questions to the child. Although directive play therapy resolves issues quicker, it is best for certain cases. During the intake, I discuss with parents what they can expect from play therapy and which direction I would be taking with their child. Below are some examples of what play therapy would look like. Play therapy with children ages 0-5 Play therapy with very young children (0-5) looks very different from play therapy with children who are more developed. Therapy with young children have high parental involvement and often is used in family therapy. I’ve worked with many parents and toddlers on building a connection or stronger emotional relationship, especially with those who have gone through a divorce, blended family, or separation. I introduce many activities that would promote eye contact, soothing touch and interaction. I’ve worked on reunifying some parents and toddlers who were separated at birth by helping them learn how to relate to one another. For children who have some language, some activities I use to help promote expressing and exploring their feelings include: using clay to make facial expression, drawing, and painting. To help explore what is going on in their lives or teaching them healthy communication skills through role playing, I might use stuffed animals, puppets, or a dollhouse. With some children this age, giving them nondirective play also allows me to see themes of how they might be feeling or are treated at home or school. What about school-aged children? Play therapy with older children who already have verbal language tend to be more directive in my office. Some examples include playing board games or card games to teach impulse control (not going out of turn, shouting out the answer, cheating), learning social skills through role playing, playing Candyland to express their feelings (ex. each color is a different emotion), creating fun ways to use relaxation skills, or drawing their support network. If you come by our office, you might catch me playing red light green light down the hallway to help my client learn how to control their body. All in all, play therapy is about creating a healthy working relationship with your child. Sometimes the feedback I get from children is that I’m one of the few adults they can trust to talk about difficult things with, and I also hear from parents that sometimes I say the same exact thing they have already said to their child but they happen to listen to me! As an adult, it can be very easy to sit opposite of your therapist and delve into the problems that brought you to treatment. But for children, they need a more fun and creative way to get their minds working and that’s really what play therapy is!
At Thrive, we take a positive, client centered approach to therapy that is focused on creating a genuine connection with our clients. If you would like to talk with a Thrive Therapist about yourself, your child, or teen attending therapy, please reach out to us by phone at 858-342-1304. |
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Thrive Therapy Studio Therapists Offer Child, Teen, Adult, Marriage and Family Psychotherapy Counseling Services in San Diego, California.
